Seems silly to think about scaffolding the skill of movement, with PTSD/CPTSD, I often get stuck in freeze mode. Learning how to incorporate movement back into my life has been a process. I use to do a lot of high intensity workouts which kept my nervous system in high cortisol.
I didn't realize at the time, being raised with the Nike slogan of "just do it", or "no pain no gain" type attitude kept me in a loop. I was going full tilt at work and after work. Eventually my nervous system shut me down. What I thought I was doing to keep myself healthy, in retrospect was doing a lot of damage.
#PTSD #CPTSD #trauma can manifest in different ways. For me, I kept going to escape the trauma I was enduring at work. Once I had a nervous break down, which holds a lot of stimga to it, I actually learned to embrace it. I learned about the importance of the vagus nerve, sympathetic and parasympathetic nervous system. How to regulate myself. #breathwork #coldwatertherapy #holistichelath #naturopath #mentalhealththerapy #mentalhealth
What has been missing was movement. Enjoying working out. I had to scaffold those skills. Here are some tips I have used, I hope you find them helpful.
#stimming is most often associated with autism, I use the word as a #somatic tool. I have a playlist of music that makes me want to move, dance, shake it out. Creating a playlist solely for the purpose of connecting to joy and movement. So I played it loud when I cleaned, do chores, etc. What I was doing was associating the music with movement. I needed to rewire my brain knowing it was safe to move. *remember the body remembers and mine remembers cortisol spikes.
Tip #2 - Aim for the day
As someone who use to time, track, log, measure exercise it was a real challenge to just move again. If I wasn't doing so many sets at a specific weight, or walking/running a specific time/distance what was the sense? Overcoming the mindset to just move, took time! A lot of time.
Just moving/dancing/stimming with my playlist as often as I could was key. The key was to feel safe in my body, safe in my breathing, safe in my cortisol levels.
Dressing for the part is also part of my routine. With PTSD, my processing at times is altered. So, I am learning to dress in work out clothes even if I don't plan to work out until later in the day. Changing clothes, showering, etc can be exhausting.
"“The attempt to escape from pain, is what creates more pain.”
― Gabor Maté
Tip #3 - Mindset
Learning to reset my mind from results/output to being in the moment/movment continues to take time. Learning to not track, monitor, etc at first was a real challenge. I was so use to walking a certain distance at a certain time. I had to retrain myself to walk 4.7 km instead of the 5km for example, turning at a different space than the assigned spot. Sounds silly, but isn't as easy as one thinks.
Tip #4 - Mix it up
I would dance, move, walk, hike. I didn't focus on what I use to be able to do, but learned to focus on movement. The key was to connect the feeling of JOY/HAPPINESS to movement. It was no longer a puishment for weighing too much, eating too much, etc. I wanted to feel happy when I move.
Tip #5 - Gratitude
Learning to switch my mindset from punishment towards working out. Harder/faster/stronger, to lose weight, gain muscle, etc. And just be grateful I am able to move took time. #Gratitude is huge with mental health.
Connect to movement
It does take time, but slow scaffolding of skills to relearn makes a difference. For now, I am doing low intensity, old school box/exercise classes, walks, hikes. It has been 3 years of getting my body into feeling safe enough to move, that I am grateful I am able to slowly find the joy again.
xo
Lori Anne
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